We stepped foot into Downtown Disney with food and shopping in mind. By the next morning we found ourselves inside the park roaming the Main Street drag for Kenny Rogers sightings. We estimate that between 30-50 Kenny Rogers look-a-likes could be inside the gates of the Magic Kingdom at any given moment. Upon seeing one idling along, we said amongst ourselves, “Kenny Rogers!”
I wonder how many Kenny Rogers were out surfing that very same morning?
Vintage surfboard and... could it be? Nah...
Looking among rocks for any sign of Kenny Rogers.
Or fishing?
Maybe he went over the side...
Or serving vacationers of California’s coastal waters as saintly Kenny Rogers knights of Baywatch?
This one is for the ladies...
There weren’t any Kenny Rogers the day before at the Rain Forest Café, better known as the place where the metro guys sit in “the gay blue elephant.”
We did see a rather fem-looking green-shirted Elvis with big gold glasses, his thank-you-very-much pompadour flopped with a life of its own as Dirty Spanglish and I sat on a bench searching our inner selves for a second wind.
“Somewhere in the park is a padded bench; the ultimate resting spot,” I said near the closed Pirates of the Caribbean ride. A mock Indiana Jones had just mocked me. He never sits down, just wobbles in untiring animatronic puppet glee.
What could I do but search the park for padded comfort, more Kenny Rogers, and decent chicken fingers. Hint: Try the Golden Horseshoe restaurant.
It was during the lull in the day’s action that Dirty Spanglish and I decided to go find a chocolate snacks and cinnamon rolls, only to discover the park’s purest form of comfort—padded benches not just for under the tush, but for weary backs as well.
Dirty Spanglish gets freaky...
Just before launching a baby Donald over a kiosk... The very same kiosk last year saw a Buzz flyby
We had to dive further into Main Street, into the Coca-Cola Refreshment Corner to find Davey Jones Padded Locker had surfaced among a sea of theme park revelers. It was the perfect seating: a big red cushy bench lining an equally cushy back wall.
Munching on our snacks we began to forget about Kenny Rogers and instead began to focus on flare. You know the scene in Office Space with Jennifer Aniston getting chastised for only wearing the minimum amount of flare on her restaurant uniform?
Disneyland has the equivalent of flare that you can purchase throughout the park (character buttons by the bushel load), and so we began to peoplewatch and point out anyone with outstanding flare—mascots and workers did not count—just the tourists with lots of buttons hanging from big leashes around their necks. Is there anything Disney can’t get people to buy?
I’m thinking one of the next Disney gimmicks needs to be some kind of street drug that gets folks to playback only Disney related memories and other princessy hallucinations in their spinny heads. Imagine people junked up on Disney cartoons playing back through their bloodstreams like traveling hormones. The park could sell them right from barrels on Main Street. Better yet, Disneyland has no real dress code anymore, why not a tattoo parlor as part of the new Pirates ride? Give someone a skull and crossbones Captain Jack tattoo and they get a free lifetime online membership and bonus cruise ship points every year. Why not, the Suicide Girls get people to tattoo themselves all the time…think of all the great conversations at the workplace…
So there we were, staring at flare, when I noticed on the very same comfortable red bench a script getting a heavy dose of the red pen.
What could this be? A Disney film representative getting in-the-park inspiration to do a script pass right in the park?
She looked very busy, and I didn’t want to bother her. Sure I made some small talk, but I know when I am out working in an inspiring area, I don’t necessarily like to be bothered either.
And yet, I wanted to know what she was working on.
What could it be? The story of a new princess movie? Perhaps about an Indian princess and evil British Colonialists, with one good soldier boy Brit trying to steal her love? Or perhaps a more urban cartoon with lifeguards and a young actress spinning herself a web of glamour on 1940s Hollywood streets... aren’t actresses American princesses? There could be a handsome rich chap falling for the waitress actress who disappears to dark Hollywood streets... Hollywood is so princess central. Just look at Brangelina…
Or maybe she was toiling over the sequal to more of Nemo’s adventures ala The Freaky Fish Show?
I strained to look.
Yet I could see nothing but red ink. How could I see the script through so much re-writes?
What was this lady doing to this poor bleeding script??
Just kidding. I kept a safe distance, made some small talk and discovered her name: Jenny Huffman.
Do I have any idea what she does for Disney?
No. I got her card and it had a travel guide link. So at the very least you can go book a trip through her site’s search engines.
In the end, Jenny gave me her potato chips as she got up to walk away. You know, sometimes that’s all you can ask when you’re as comfortable as we were on the hidden red fluffy red benches of Disneyland… a park treasure for sure.
Roger Mathey is one of those theatre guys who is a little pretentious; yeah he has a bit of an ego, but so what? He's funny as hell. He loves the Green Lantern, and he has a heart as big as the world. He's a director, a producer, a creative director, a motivator, an actor, a film buff, a creative Wile E. Coyote Super Genius, and most people love him, myself included.
Just don't tell him what to do when he's doing his biznatch.
Read his tip of the week about morons in theatre trying to step on the big wig producer. Yeah, he kicks them to the curb!
Roger also has rekindled a favorite bit of ambiguous writing called The Back Pocket. He's got four written now and you're going to want to read each one carefully because they're all about local Bakersfield theatre gossip.
Read between the lines and you'll learn who is boinking who, who the local theatre whores are, and who needs an ego enema. I just wish Roger would cough up the real names of all folks involved in the REAL drama of local theatre. Damn him.
Last year I helped out with the first ever Bakersfield Independent Film Festival (BIFF) at the Spotlight Theatre. I made some posters, helped promote, and talked on the radio a little about how excited I was to be a part of BIFF.
Photo of last year's BIFF poster at Spotlight Theatre
Creative genius Roger Mathey started up the film festival as a way to better promote local filmmakers. The problem is not the Kern Film Festival. The Kern Film Festival has its own solid agenda of showing mostly famous movies filmed in the Bakersfield area.
BIFF promises to show films by filmmakers with a Bakersfield connection. That means you don’t have to actually reside in Bakersfield or be from Bakersfield to show your film at BIFF. You just have to be connected. A few degrees of separation might just hold a slot for your movie-making prowess to be shown off. BIFF is all about connections between community and people. The film festival is a celebration of local film buffs, hobbyists, and the serious actors, actresses and filmmakers of the future who are connected to the Southern San Joaquin Valley.
Here’s a sample of Scott Chesire’s BIFF contribution in a scene from his cult film, TV Party Tonight. This is a scene built from a dozen vintage toy commercials, an Alice Cooper song and old propaganda war footage:
You can see the entire TV Party Tonight film at BIFF!
Roger Mathey hopes to build on last year’s successful first run.
I’ll be making another poster design like I donated last year. And lots of folks will be donating their time and artwork to a worthy cause.
In the meantime, if you have a film submission, please contact Roger Mathey at the Spotlight Theatre. The festival is just a few weeks away and is scheduled for the 3rd week of June, 2006. Don't miss out!!
Film Submission Contact: Roger Mathey Executive Director Spotlight Theatre 1622 19th Street Bakersfield, CA 93301 661 634 0692 office 310 930 7254 cell
June 9th is going to be a great night for punk music...
I was browsing through local band blogs and just found a great story...
Now, if you’re in the mood for punk rock and you’re getting hitched, then I know of a band…
If you have an event, a bar mitzvah, a graduation, or just want all hell to break loose in your living room, then I know of a band…
If you think you have seen it all at your friendly neighborhood Latino family weddings and want to experiment with a great father/daughter quinceniera dance number, then boy, do I know of a band!
Let’s just say if you’re simply in the mood, then look no further, Box Jumper is here. Or at least they were back in April and I'm assuming they are still here as they have played a few shows around town as of late.
The fabulous Rob Shock of Box Jumper
Just who are Box Jumper? Take the rural rock punk of the Filthies, add in a dose of hardcore punk, mix in a good vibe of Rob Shock sarcasm, and there you are!
I just read a hilarious blog from Box Jumper frontman, Rob Shock about his punk band performing at a local Latino wedding just before a mariachi band. It’s a must read about a great local punk band who also has Ridikule’s Jason Manning as their bass player.
I'm still laughing...
Box Jumper will be performing June 9th at Vinny's Bar.
I’ve been covering the Bakersfield music scene for more than a year and a half and finally heard the story about Buck Owens’ telecaster with the red-white-and-blue flag painted on it. It’s an interesting tale about a little-known country musician from the band Stampede who had some gift baskets made for the Buckaroos (Stampede often performs at the Crystal Palace). When Buck unexpectedly showed up where the gift baskets were, there was no basket for him. So the musician had a special guitar made for Buck with an American flag on it. He gave it to Buck the same day Brad Paisley also presented Buck Owens with a guitar.
Fat chance that Buck was going to use the new American flag telecaster, right? Wrong. Buck used the guitar in his performances at the Crystal Palace over the last few years of his life. The guitar was even propped on the Crystal Palace stage at Buck’s viewing. I guess that old electric horse meant something to cowboy Buck.
Meet Stan Ellis, millionaire extraordinaire, country musician with a big heart, who even performed at Buck Owens’ statue unveiling. Ellis is a hopeful politician who prefers the word “statesman” and who is the culprit who gave the guitar that Buck Owens used to his dying day. Ellis has dumped about half a million bucks of his own pesos into his ad campaign, enough to get him pegged by the local mainstream media in what Ellis claims is unjustifiably as “the rich guy trying to buy the election”. You might love Ellis after this article; you might hate him, or even vote for him. The most important idea to remember after reading my two cents? Go out and vote…
I haven’t always voted, and that’s one of my major regrets in life.
********
A working man's office:
I sat in Stan Ellis’ office yesterday waiting on a couch while he took a phone call and walked outside the room. Now I’ve seen a lot of offices in my day. I’ve seen the fancy president’s office of the Golden Nugget Hotel-Casino. He even had his secretaries walking his dogs on Fremont Street. Talk about pampered (although I really liked the old Nugget president). I’ve seen the smoky offices of some lame presidents tucked away like caves in fortress-covered hillsides. Stan’s office is a working man’s office. Sure, he’s top dog at his company, but his office is sparse. One couch, a medium-sized desk, a stuffed quail and a few reprints of aviation history on the walls. His desk wasn’t as messy as mine, and there was a cowboy hat wrapped in plastic on the couch next to me. It's a perfect office for a conversation between guys wearing jeans and baseball caps. We weren't wearing caps.
No need for flash in the pan.
Politics, contribution money and postcards:
Now you might be wondering just what in the heck I was doing in a hopeful politicians office. It all started with a handwritten postcard in the mail that read:
“Hi and thank you for taking the time to talk with me. Stan has been a life long Republican as well as an independent businessman for 30 years. Vote Stan Ellis on June 6th. Sincerely, Mindy Ellis”
The postcard...
On the flip side I could see Stan’s campaign slogan, “Let’s Talk.”
Of course I don’t watch TV or listen to the radio, so I had never heard the Ellis slogan. So I called the number and left a message.
I wanted to learn more in case he did call me back, so I turned to the Internet. Most of you know me as an Internet junky. You can find all kinds of gobbledy-gook on folks on the Net…
Right away on Google I found a few Ellis quotes that I wasn’t too happy with. But were they misquotes? Maybe. The mixture of politics and mainstream journalism are often a deadly brew for candidates, with no antidote other than upping money spent in campaigns: billboards, signs, posters, mailers, phone calls, radio commercials, TV ads, and so on. Misquotes could just mean taking out of context. Usually depends on the media’s slant. Is the media liberal, conservative or anything in between? If you can figure out the slant, then you can usually figure out the news perspective of how candidates will be portrayed.
Just ask yourself about the Californian’s perspective on Ellis. They wrote an article talking about him spending his own money on himself. I told him, “You seem like a passionate guy, competitive in business. I’m not guessing you entered the race to lose. So why not spend your own money if you have it. I would.” I met Ellis and could tell he really gets disturbed about asking people for money. Some people are givers and not takers. His friend Chris who runs a helicopter company called me soon after the meeting and during the conversation said, “Hey, Stan really hates to take money. We practically get in fist fights every time I try to buy his lunch.”
I hope Stan doesn’t find out I write for free. He might come and kick my tail into next week.
What I did learn is that Ellis is a giver.
He even showed me an itemized Quickbooks list of contributions since 1998. The total came out to just above $183,000.00. Even if half of those items weren’t legit, it sure makes him look better than the $600.00 that some media folks say he contributed. Heck he even contributed to friends in the Democratic Party. And Ellis is a Republican! Ellis claims to have contributed another $30,000.00 to $40,000.00 on top of the list I saw. He made his point. I saw the lists: schools, school groups, politicians, Battered Women’s groups, Arnie, etc… the list was more than two pages long.
Going over contributions...
Ellis gets hot about a passionate money-spending issue regarding his campaign and accusations against his contribution history...
And let me tell you, Stan Ellis showed some emotion. His voice raised and he was quite animated. And rightly so. Who likes to be misrepresented?
If he indeed was misrepresented. I can’t prove anything other than expressing my opinion about the paper trail that I saw.
But what did I find online that I didn’t like about Ellis political perspective?
I told Ellis that I’m a moderate and he agreed he leans to the far right, so naturally we’re not going to agree on everything.
I found one online quote about Stan Ellis referring to blogs as “tabloid journalism”. Was Ellis referring more to “conversation journalism” and political tactics using such blogs, or invasive journalism as in a paparazzi peeking over his backyard fence? I think he was referring to anonymous folks leaving baiting comments and questions. I can understand not wanting to answer folks who won’t leave their identity. Might as well talk to thin air.
Tough talk from Ellis on immigration:
Another quote went as follows:
“One of her GOP opponents in the 32nd Assembly District, Stan Ellis, objected to protests by illegal immigrants. ‘If in fact illegals are protesting in our streets, they have not earned the right to free speech,’ Ellis said.”
On Stan Ellis’ website he speaks out further in an MP3 audio file and claims that none of the 12 million illegal immigrants in American today should gain citizenship.
Not one? Well Stan, what should we do with them? And why can’t they speak out?
We talked about it later and he mentioned that the process towards legalization needs to be slow. And he does seem very sympathetic to immigrants. His ancestors are immigrants and he is a self-made man, having come to California with an old car, a few thousand bucks in the bank and a wife and kids, nothing else. Now he runs several businesses, and successfully too.
I definitely didn’t agree with his statements online though. America is country symbolic of freedom to the global community. Citizen or not, human beings have a right to speak out, especially on the streets of America. England once claimed its own subjects were illegally speaking out against mother England. England was never confused about who Americans were citizens of—England. The right to American Revolution and all the freedoms that came with it (illegally in the eyes of England) is no different than an illegal immigrant opportunist wanting to help their family in a new land. Otherwise popular American documents wouldn’t refer to inalienable rights and rights of pursuing happiness and so forth; they wouldn’t read as rights of man, but rights of only people in America who are citizens. The Declaration of Independence was to declare rights for all men who are created equal, not just for Americans are only equal on American soil. There are human rights issues at stake. All others would be victims of some militaristic notion of silencing people.
Why want to silence people? What if an illegal immigrant witnessed a crime, a murder, or was a doctor who discovered a cure for the common cold? Would you still silence them? No right to speak out?
If illegal immigrants aren’t welcome to speak out in America, then why should Americans be allowed to speak out on the streets of Baghdad? To the Iraqis we illegally invaded. And maybe rightly so. Were there Weapons of Mass Destruction? Just making a point here. I’m just saying if the war were illegal, then Americans speaking out on foreign soil through big gun mouthpieces is… just? Or any American traveling anywhere for that matter? Just because someone isn’t in a country legally doesn’t mean they don’t have human rights enough to speak out. Speaking out could mean the right not to be short-changed at a grocery store.
By the way, I have been a supporter through much of the war.
What if America were in another huge Civil War and you lived in a city being bombed and barely escaped with your belongings and family and high-tailed it over a fence into Canada. Wouldn’t you want to be treated with sympathy? Or would you prefer being silenced in some anti-American refugee camp guarded by Canucks with machine guns who don’t like illegal immigrants?
If Yahoo and Google help silence people who blog in China, should America even show disregard for anyone in America who has a voice and isn’t in jail? See, I’m not talking about murderers, embezzlers, rapists, and so forth. I’m talking about hard working people who happen to be illegal immigrants with jobs right now in America. Or even if they don’t work and they’re someone’s 80 year old grandmother…
Even they have a voice.
Foreigners own many businesses in America, and are allowed to speak about their views everyday in the global and American workplace. In fact, many foreign nationals come to America and preach propaganda about their own countries that may be under martial law, with policies that often lead to torture for everyday workers like you and me just for sneezing wrong.
Heed my advice. Stay away from Burma. Especially if you ever find their spokesmen in the U.S.
******
Avoiding the blog baiters:
Stan did speak his mind about bloggers and said he doesn’t dislike bloggers at all, he is simply aware that people might bait him in blog comments on mainstream websites. I wouldn’t call that tabloid journalism, just bait tactics that Ellis doesn’t like to be trapped into. Who wants to have to muck through the opposing party’s traps? I get folks who bait me all the time through emails and blogs. Sometimes I pretend to fall for it, other times I speak out, and a lot of the time I ignore baiting.
Just ask Senator McCain. He took a few good verbal black eyes when he recently stepped into a hornet’s nest, allowing himself to be baited and verbally pummeled.
In the case of McCain, he got more respect for allowing himself to get pummeled a bit. It’s up to Ellis whether or not he ever wants to do the same.
I was angry myself at first over an online pummeling I recently read. But the anger quickly went away and I called for more bold red sentences! Stir the buckets of controversy! Let people speak out on their websites if they don’t like me. I know that not everybody likes everybody, that people misunderstand each other, misinterpret messages, and even launch campaigns against you. That’s just the nature of what happens when people think you should act according to their standards, and not your own.
I think Ellis has his own standards. Some will like his perspective some wont. And agree or not, that doesn’t mean he has no integrity as a leader who cares passionately about the future of his kids, his business, and in wanting to help fix the over-bureaucracy of America.
Maybe that’s just plain old idealism.
Regarding blogs, Stan Ellis prefers discussions where he can see folks or hear their voice. I can’t blame him for that. In fact, I can appreciate the integrity of wanting honest debates. I get strange anonymous comments all the time that lack in credibility because there are no names attached. Like I stated earlier: might as well talk to thin air.
Ellis and I did sit down and talk about illegal immigrants and he did indicate once again that he felt illegal immigrants didn’t have a right to speak out. I gave some examples from this very article and Stan indicated, “There’s an exception to every rule.” OK, we agree on that, which was my point.
A businessman, Stan takes time out of his own day to help teach immigrants how to pilot. And he’s not mad at illegal immigrants. He’s frustrated at the system. He feels America’s bureaucratic system has let everyone down. He wants legislation backed up that was in place more than twenty years ago. “Let’s streamline immigration and secure the borders.”
OK, we sort of agree.
I know I’m fairly progressive about human rights. Not everybody believes illegal immigrants have a right to speak out. But then, I would take many an illegal immigrant’s speech over some government official who might be visiting the U.S. and talking to an ethnic group about how great working conditions are in Shanghai, when all I can think about is Communists imprisoning people like Hao Wu for simply writing a blog titled, Beijing or Bust. Try living in a Chinese prison for four months.
There’s something to say for a free country treating all immigrants with integrity who aren’t breaking a law other than sneaking over a border, and who aren’t suspected terrorists.
And yet Ellis didn’t completely disagree with my sympathetic voice.
What about MySpace.com:
We moved on. I asked his opinion of myspace.com. He claimed, “People have the right of free speech.” He also mentioned that parents should be held responsible and monitor their kids on the site. Holy smokes, we agree. I then let him in on why I asked. Yeah, I had baited ol’ Stanley a bit. I found out one of his workers was on myspace and wanted to see what he thought.
The Thomas-sleaze affair:
Yet I’m not letting Stan Ellis get away so easy. Seems there’s at least one other issue. I also received mail that reads, “Thank You! Congressman Thomas and Assemblyman McCarthy. For all the hard work you have done in helping to improve our highway and road needs. I want to assure you from Sacramento that I will be there to carry on your good work. I promise I won’t let you down.”
The Thomas-Sleaze Affair...
Seems there was a phone message on Wednesday that claimed to be Bill Thomas’ office, and that Bill Thomas does not endorse Stan Ellis, and that they know Ellis has documents with Thomas’ name on them. Check out this hateful message.
The mean message from Bill Thomas' office welcoming Ellis to the world of American politics, where even people in your own party might call you a sleazoid. Thanks, Bill.
So what’s the deal?
“I just appreciate what Thomas and McCarthy did for us. I made a statement about it. Why not, I donated a $1000.00 to McCarthy’s campaign.” He indicated that such name calling is juvenile.
Yeah, but now Ellis is inside the political spectrum. And within the political spectrum, relationships change, because it’s all about gaining power, forming alliances and winning votes. Statesman or politician, it’s the same sphere,and it’s a harsh world of people smearing people.
So Thomas didn’t appreciate being thanked by Ellis in a mailer. He views Ellis as a campaigner with a sleazy mission. To gain office? To win votes? If Thomas is correct, then all politicians are sleazy.
A businessman from the people:
Ellis then took me on a tour of his business.
Inside the flooring factory...
A sample flooring...
We walked through where hard dance floors are made. I could hear saws and see piles of flooring waiting to be packaged and sent out. We then headed out into the chemical engineering aspects of his business, where Ellis and his team build various systems that help dredge and clean waste.
Stan Ellis explains the waste-cleaning processes of one of his machines
He and his team have even developed a method of making asphalt that takes refinery waste products and transforms the byproducts into a binding agent used in new and old asphalt. He claims the new asphalt is extremely binding and flexible.
Various grades of asphalt samples...
We then walked across the street to where he is partners in an equipment company. I shook the hands of a few of his workers and commented that they seemed to have a good work ethic.
Did Ellis prep his workers in how to respond before I arrived?
I doubt it. He’s a likeable man with a sense of integrity and almost naïve passion about politics that not all leaders have. That’s idealism, and with idealism comes a desire to want to make a difference. He wants a new career in the Republican sector. I can see that. Why not? I saw his itemized contributions. Why not jump into the foray if he’s already spending money, and if he’s a well liked businessman and leader with an opinion?
How long have you worked for Stan Ellis?
One worker who we stopped to shake hands with said he was with the company for four years. I joked and said, “When Stan walks away do you say, ‘Four years too long?’”
I don’t think I have to go into detail that finding major events for kids’ lives to grab hold of and be inspired by are rare. Tonight was inspiring because Paul Cartwright was invited along with Catfish and Sonny Langely to come and perform at Bakersfield’s Crystal Palace.
People who have met Dude on the Ice know he’s a violinist, a kid who plays in the BHS orchestra, but who has never had private lessons. He’s a kid who seems more comfortable skating on ice than he is in his own shoes. He had never seen Paul Cartwright perform, until now.
Paul Cartwright helps set up the stage area
The Beergrass Boys
How do you explain such inspiration? Such a fiddler and violinist as Paul Cartwright only happens in a city the size of Bakersfield once in a long blue moon. I can’t even describe Cartwright’s musical ability other than phenomenal. Restaurant goers stopped shoveling mashed potatoes to holler and whistle as Cartwright tore into solos that could melt your heart with the beauty of bow and strings. His command over his instrument I have rarely seen; and there are a lot of great musicians in Bakersfield.
I had only seen Catfish perform once, and only briefly. He and Cartwright have performed together for more than three years and tonight had arrived as the Beergrass Boys. His songwriting and storytelling ability is as much of a journey as the music that rides along the length of Cartwright’s magical bow. You listen, you’re carried away, and you almost forget that he’s strumming along and singing about life in Bakersfield and beyond while Cartwright is hitting notes on the violin that I thought weren’t possible.
Catfish sings the country blues
Catfish stories are meant to be listened to as country blues songs that are as inspiring as they are inspired in how they were written. “I bought a Johnny Cash CD, listened to one song, and was so inspired that I went and wrote this song before listening to the rest of the album,” Catfish said before launching in to a great storytelling piece of musical literature.
A big thanks to Fatt Katt from Fatt Katt and the Vonzippers for bringing a great night of music to Buck Owens’ Crystal Palace that also included legend Sonny Langely. He’s a guitarist stage friend of Merle Haggard, ex-boxer from the navy back in the 50s, and a musician who seems to have known everyone in the country music industry.
Fatt Katt and the Vonzippers
Sonny Langely takes out his famous signature guitar
He straps it on...
The he sings to country high heaven...
Sonny came onstage with Fatt Katt to sing "Okie from Muskogee" and several other Merle Haggard songs that had the crowd stomping their feet along with chomping on the Dwight Yoakam biscuits in their baskets. I had the chicken fried steak and let me tell you it’s the biggest meal in Bakersfield.
After Sonny left, Les Paw started to boogie with the bass
Fatt Katt got into his kitty cat rhythms
And Les jumped onto his bass in a high defying act of thumpa whumpin
Another enjoyable night of Bakersfield music, complete with legends old and new, and inspiration for young folks that can make a parent proud.
Kids are our future. Don’t we want them to be motivated?
And the best part of the night: as we were leaving, Sonny Langely made his way back to the stage and grabbed his guitar. He bumped the case into Les Paw and waved to Fatt Katt. As he came down the stage stairs we happened to be passing by. I told Sonny how much I enjoyed his music. He was so appreciative he insisted on holding the door open for us even though he was carrying a guitar case and walking with his wife, Mildred.
I was going to write about the local music scene in a grandiose blog about how bands shouldn't give away music. But then I was inspired by a fellow blogger...
Years ago when I was married—I don’t even think I had kids yet—me and the old missy took a drive with my in-laws into the mountains. To be honest, I don’t even remember where in God’s name we were going and why we were there. Hell, it might have even been before I was married. Must have been the late 80s or early 90s. We drove in some phat middle class suburban Oldsmobile and ended up in typical California golden mountains.
Right smack in the middle of those mountains was a lake. There were no trees in sight; just a lake tucked into the mountains like a lone puddle of spit. Not a big lake, you could walk around after a short journey, but couldn’t throw rocks all the way across. I really wish I could remember why in hell we were walking around this lake. I don’t have a clue other than the in-laws wanted some kind of sappy outdoorsy moment because they had just gotten married and so were feeling all Mary Poppins about the local hills and lakes.
I’m thinking it was a Sunday.
Well, me and the little lady at the time thought it would be cool to walk around the lake. So we started off, leaving the old timers to spread their tentacles over each other which was making us gag anyways.
Fine, it was a nice day and I needed to walk. Who can take sitting in a car with old people blasting Gospel music for hours on end anyways? I was growing tired of singing Cumbayah. So we plodded over rocks on a trail that I remember was a magical little moment of mountain breezes and skipping rocks. That was until I started to get stomach pain. And I don’t mean the kind of stomach pain that means you’re going to throw up. I’m telling you my feet were shaking and I was beginning to need a bathroom like I never needed one before.
Lucky for me there was a bathroom just up the trail.
Like I said, I’m thinking it was a Sunday, because even though I made it to a tiny shack of a bathroom, the fucking door was locked. And you know how some of these hidden mountain communities are about their days off. If it’s Sunday, lock up and go home and watch football and trim the grass. To make matters worse, while I stood there at the bathroom fumbling with the door I could see the gooey in-laws making their way around the lake.
You tell me what the fuck I should have done right then when the unpreventable Tsunami of my loins was coming whether I wanted it to or not? Yeah I was desperate. I think I barely had the strength to mutter, “I’m going around back,” hoping she would understand the complicated situation in which I was faced. Yes, that meant she had to be the lookout. Not that it would have mattered. I could think of worse situations where in-laws catch you with your pants down. Especially if we were just dating. Like I said, I don’t actually remember if we were married at the time.
Anyway, I felt like a dog just then and sort of sniffed out a good spot, released the hounds in a most pleasurable moment, and then realized I had nothing to wipe my ass with. Hearing the words, “They’re coming!” didn’t help matters any more but only sent me into a panic where I grabbed a clump of dry grass and weeds, didn’t even bother to check for bugs, and repeated the process at least twice. What could I do?
Needless to say, by the time the in-laws reached us they didn’t know a thing, and I think my secret has been safe until now.
But why tell such a horrendous secret of such embarrassing proportions? Because of inspiration. Thank Black Dog and his most revealing “Tower of Terror or Something” tale. You will never laugh so hard in your entire life about “Taking the Dare.” Go read it now and leave him a comment if you dare... Who knows, maybe you’ll even share some potty talk…
I have no idea what Greg is doing in this unrelated photo. (Unknown photographer)
I wasn't able to make a recent poetry gig, but poet/author Greg Goodsell attended and gave a poetry reading. Here's his two cents on the evening.
By Greg Goodsell:
The poetry reading held at the Youth League on 19th Street on the evening of May 18th only drew about 20 audience members. The people who elected to sweat it out at the tired ol’ Street Faire a few blocks away that night missed out. There was gourmet cheese, fruit and wine for days in a beautiful, air-conditioned building, and all of it for free! Their loss …and the 20 people who did show up were the right 20 people!
I was asked to open at the behest of Lisa LoBasso, who has been hosting these readings every couple of months this year. It was my first time in front of a microphone in quite awhile. I opened up with a funny piece (most of my stuff is comedic) called "Sir Alec Guinness," which is a heartfelt bit about the expectations and limitations placed upon by the artist by his audience. I then did an edgy piece called "Inga Barks’ Number One Fan," a satirical number about a stalker pursuing KERN Newstalk Radio Talk Show Hostess Inga Barks. In real life, Inga and I get along famously. The skit is not a put-down of her, but rather how people can misinterpret her and form the "wrong" opinions. I then finished up with a reading for Morbid Curiosity magazine, on how there is an audience for every conceivable type of art.
Lisa then read selections from her poetry book, "In the Swollen," which is now in its second printing! Go Lisa! The evening ended with the headliner, Frances O’Connell, who has served as LoBasso’s mentor. Her poems were strong, tough and full of imagery, capable of wringing tears or laughter. It was a most entertaining evening and c’mon gang! Show support to our local poets!
Whereas Ray Hacke, Citizen Journalist Editor of the Bakersfield Californian gave a rousing pep talk to present opportunities for everyday folks to get published in the Bakersfield Californian and its niche markets, my speech was more like one gentleman described as a “shotgun blast.”
Ray Hacke of the Bakersfield Californian listens to the Writers of Kern
Hacke delivers his pitch to local writers
Although I read from a lengthy speech on “Aggressive Blogging for Today’s Writers,” I purposely strayed and began by declaring a caveat to what Ray Hacke described as great opportunities for local writers: submitting material to the Bakersfield Californian and its niche markets to be published for free.
“There is a moral and ethical dilemma that writers face in today’s world of blogging and providing free content to the media," I said. "Just a few years ago I was writing for Citysearch.com and getting a hundred or so bucks for 150 word pieces. We have now entered an era of exploited citizen labor by the mainstream media publishing content without paying writers.”
Although that doesn’t mean folks shouldn’t write for free, it does mean there is a danger in the system. I go on to say later in my speech, “Bloggers just may be in a new age of global farm workers, farming words like beets and asparagus so the farmer media can resell those yummy foodstuffs to eager eaters of online information. Maybe bloggers need a union. Who knows?”
A revolutionary thought, for sure, but truthful. Ray Hacke gets a salary to harvest writers and their content. What do the writers get? Although he is right that a very few writers get paid gigs out of the deal, and getting published in the newspaper could lead toward greater credibility, that still means the majority of citizen writers are writing for free.
Members of the Writers of Kern listen in as N.L. gives his "Shotgun Speech".
Does that mean citizen writers should always write for free? No. No one should always write for free if their content is being consistently used to sell newspapers.
Because of the advent of the Internet and blogging, words have become devalued. If the average person can continually contribute free content without an end goal in mind of eventually getting paid, that means such writers don’t understand that what they do is as valuable as a farm worker helping to get food onto tables.
Words or foodstuffs, it’s no different to me. We all have to work to make a living, what does it matter if it’s cantaloupe or wordsmithing?
Farmers used to exploit farm workers by actually making them have to start as apprentices, working for free for short amounts of time, and sometimes even paying the farmer so they could start working for them. Is that what's happening?
At the same time, I promoted the hell out of Bakotopia (owned by the Californian) and passed out free T-shirts and flyers. I called the Californian perhaps the most progressive newspaper in the country. And I also described how with Bakotopia, traffic is directed back to me. I get something out of it for now. As a writer who wants to network and sell books, being highly visible has a value. Writers need to make sure they have their own web pages so traffic can be directed back to them.
I went on to also describe along with my regular speech, that though Bakotopia has as a target an audience that ranges between the years of 18-35, savvy writers can actually shape Bakotopia, help give it direction, and even direct it into other markets just by way of kinds of varying the content uploaded.
“Already we’re seeing Matt Munoz change the very face of Bakotopia by providing an outlet for citizen journalist content that reaches beyond their target market. Your voice can shape the direction of the media,” I said.
Of course I joked around and told Ray Hacke "plug your ears" when talking of controversy, which I don’t even look at as controversy, but rather the realistic side, the truth of what is happening because of citizen contributions to the mainstream media.
How do you fix the dilemma, this writer trap of writing for free while others make money off the hard work of writers? You have to ask yourself what the newspaper values more, citizen words or their relationships with advertisers? Who is replaceable? That’s hard to say. The Bakersfield Californian is a business. They want to survive. I told the audience, “The newspaper is dying, they’re a business and they’re using smart tactics by including the readers into their paper.”
And why not? An article in a paper means a natural gossip chain of, “Did you see what I got in the paper?” to who knows how many folks. That can lead to selling more papers and may also mean the local newspaper staying alive.
But exploited labor? Emerging writers aren’t even aware of what’s happening to them, to their words, and to their writing future, if they have one. They’re feeling empowered, but all they’re getting is an ego boost.
It’s also important to let people know that blogging began outside the world of journalism. Journalism has taken blogging to try to reshape their own industry. Don’t let the Californian dupe you into believing that blogging in Bakersfield is just about the Californian. I found it interesting that while much of my speech talked about the Californian, discussed them in a positive and negative light, that nothing in Ray Hacke’s speech indicated that blogs existed outside of the realm of the local newspaper.
Did Ray Hacke even know I was part of the Bakersfield Californian blog community until they kicked me out and called me an uncivil bully for criticizing their lack of entertainment reporting? Don't forget, Danielle Belton was a part of my blog community until I kicked her out for the Californian's poor handling of my criticism. Funny how they only like criticism in their edited opinion section, or in blog comments they can monitor.
Should I take offense at Ray Hacke ignoring my contributions to the Bakersfield world of blogging as the leading citizen journalist? No. People aren’t necessarily programmed like robots by the corporations they work for, but cool guys like Ray Hacke have to be careful in how they express themselves in a speech that is an extension of their workplace. He needs his paycheck. I can’t blame him for being careful with his words. After all, local niche market newspapers need more community contributors so the Bakersfield Californian’s many extensions can sell lots of ads and rake in serious cash that doesn't filter back to the contributors.
I can only explore further into the truth so you can make up your own mind about what you believe.
Terry Redman snaps a photo...
The Writers of Kern are a great and diverse group. Helen Shanley and Terry Redmen are standout folks who set up a great luncheon topic that I hope will continue to be debated in local writing circles.
Bob Weiss and his new book cover design
I met Bob Weiss who wrote a book titled, Look At Me I’m Talking To You: Your Body Tells You When You Have Nutritional Deficiencies, Are You Listening? I know I will read his work. My body has been trying to tell me all kinds of crazy things over the past several months. Not sure we’ve been speaking the same language though.
I also met Robbie Byrne, piper, novelist and winner of the BBC Radio Playwright Award. His novel, Mulligan’s Pennies is part fiction, part true-to-life and details the trials of a character whose own troubled life takes him from Ireland to England and to the troubled lands of Northern Ireland. I’ll be writing more about his work soon as he has an appearance coming up at the local Barnes and Noble. (Here's a link to the story, "Whiskey Galore at the local brewery" where I mentioned Robbie playing pipes for the Queen of England. He refers to her as "Liz".)
Local writer Margie Custer stands to speak to the gathering
I also met Margie Custer, a main community contributor to the Bakersfield Californian’s Southwest Voice. She indicated she has had a few paid gigs—that’s a positive sign in the local exploited realm of unpaid writers. Margie’s contributions have included theatre reviews and even The China Chronicles. She’s working on a horror novel. Who knows, maybe she’ll let us all see a taste of her frightful work right here on nlbelardes.com.
